Toxic relationships can happen anywhere, even among those closest to us. They can be romantic, familial, professional, religious, platonic, or anything else. But how do we know if our current situation is one of toxicity?
In order to avoid toxic relationships we must recognize them early and take action. Here are some warning signs to watch out for:
15 Ways to Identify if You’re in a Toxic Relationship
1. Lack of support
The most common reason couples break up is because one person doesn’t understand what the other needs. This could mean anything from being too busy to show interest, to having unrealistic expectations about how long it takes to reach a goal.
If you’re not willing to support your partner with things that are important to him/her, it could be a sign you’re in a toxic relationship.
2. You don’t care enough
When you say something hurtful, it feels like you’re telling someone they don’t matter. If it doesn’t bother you that they feel hurt, then there’s certainly an issue in your relationship.
3. I’m not good enough
If you think you’re not good enough for your partner, you’ll never believe him or her. Instead, focus on improving yourself. If you do that, you’ll prove to your significant other that you deserve his or her love
4. I’m afraid I won’t measure up
If you constantly have to prove yourself to your partner that you are worthy of them, thats a bad sign and a road you don’t want to head down. If your relatioship is strong your partner should accept you for who you are. If they are always trying to “change you” then it’s headed in an ugly path.
5. Jealousy
Jealousy is a feeling of envy, jealousy, resentment, or possessiveness toward someone else. When we are jealous, it is usually because we think that our partner might be having sex with somebody else, or doing something better than us. We want to know what he/she is up to, and we don’t like it. This makes us feel angry, sad, frustrated, hurt, and sometimes even guilty.
We often get jealous when we see our partner talking to someone else, laughing with someone else, being happy with someone else, or spending time with someone else.
We start thinking that maybe she/he likes him/her more than us, and we become upset.
When you’re jealous, you worry that your partner might cheat on you. You might ask yourself questions such as:
“Is my partner cheating on me?” or “Why does my partner love her/himself more than me?”. You might even wonder whether your partner really loves you.
If you are experiencing feelings of jealousy, you probably feel confused, worried, angry, and disappointed. It is important to understand why you feel jealous. If you do not figure out the reason behind your jealousy, it could lead to problems in your relationship.
You can learn how to deal with jealousy by understanding why you feel jealous. By learning to control your emotions, you can avoid getting into arguments with your partner.
6. Dishonesty
Honesty is an issue many of us struggle with. We often lie to our friends, family members, coworkers, even ourselves. But dishonesty isn’t just about lying; it’s about being dishonest with yourself.
When you’re honest with yourself, you’ll know what you want out of life and how to achieve those things. You’ll become happier and healthier. And you’ll find love, success, and happiness.
7. Constant stress
Constant stress can cause many problems within relationships. Here are some things you can do to help manage it.
1. Talk about how you feel.
2. Take breaks.
3. Do something relaxing.
4. Get enough sleep.
5. Eat well.
6. Exercise regularly.
8. Contempt
Contempt is a sneaky way to say “I don’t care about your opinion.” When someone says something like this, it usually indicates that they are trying to avoid confrontation.
They’re afraid of being challenged and want to make sure that there won’t be any repercussions for their actions. This person doesn’t respect you enough to even listen to your side of the story.
Toxic relationships are full of contempt because one partner refuses to acknowledge that the other person has feelings, opinions, needs, wants, or desires. Instead, they try to control every aspect of life, including how others feel and react.
If you find yourself feeling controlled by a partner, it might be time to cut ties and move on.
9. Drama
When you feel like you are having too much drama in your life, it could mean that there is a problem with the relationship.
There are several ways to handle situations where you feel like you have too much drama. Here are some tips to help you deal with your feelings.
1. Talk to others about what is happening. Talking to friends, family members, co-workers, etc., can help you gain perspective on the situation. You might find out that you aren’t alone in feeling overwhelmed.
2. Get support from people who care about you. If you don’t know anyone else who cares about you, consider reaching out to a friend or counselor. They can offer guidance and advice.
3. Take a break. Go outside, take a walk around the block, do something fun, or go shopping. This way, you won’t be thinking about everything that is bothering you.
4. Find a hobby. Hobbies can help you relax and enjoy yourself. So whether you’re into art, music, sports, or anything else, make sure you carve out time to pursue it.
5. Don’t forget to laugh. Laughter helps us release tension and stress. Plus, laughing makes us happier. Try watching funny videos online, listening to comedy podcasts, or reading humorous books.
10. Isolation
When someone isolates themselves from people around them, it usually happens because they are unhappy with something about themselves.
If you feel like your life is controlled by someone else, you might want to consider talking to them about it.
You don’t have to agree with everything your partner says, but you should be able to talk to them without fear of being judged.
Don’t let yourself become isolated from the people you care about.
11. Walking on eggshells
Eggshell relationships are characterized by constantly fearing saying or doing anything wrong. This makes it difficult to express yourself without worrying about how someone else might react. You are afraid to make decisions because you don’t want to upset anyone.
Toxic people will always find fault in everything you say or do. They’ll criticize every aspect of your life, no matter what it is. They’re quick to judge and quick to take offense. If you’re toxic, you won’t even realize how much damage you’re causing.
Toxic partners often blame others for the problems in their relationship. Instead of taking responsibility for themselves, they blame everyone around them. They’re critical of everything you do and never give you credit for anything good. When things go well, they’re quick to throw it in your face.
If you’re dating a toxic person, you’ll feel like there’s nothing you can do to change them. You’ll spend most of your time trying to avoid conflict rather than dealing with it head-on. And since toxic people rarely apologize, you’ll feel guilty if you ever speak up.
12. Betrayal
The word betrayal carries many different meanings depending on context. In the world of online dating, it refers to cheating on a partner. But what about loyalty? What does it mean to be loyal to someone?
To me, being loyal means standing up for people and supporting them no matter what. If I’m loyal to my friends, I’ll stand up for them even if it costs me something. Being loyal doesn’t just apply to romantic partners; it applies to family members, too.
Loyalty isn’t always easy. Sometimes we’re faced with situations where our best interests are at odds with those around us.
13. Hypersensitivity
Excessive worry is often an indication of early abuse. If you are feeling anxious about something, it might be because you are worried about what might happen next. You might be afraid that your partner will hurt you again, or that he or she won’t love you anymore.
These feelings are normal, but excessive worrying about things that haven’t happened yet is a sign that you are overly sensitive.
Your partner may think that you are hypersensitive, too. He or she might believe that you are always looking over his or her shoulder and watching everything that happens. This behavior may make your partner feel like you don’t trust him or her.
If your partner seems to be getting angry at you for no reason, it might be because he or she feels threatened. When someone feels threatened, he or she becomes defensive. In turn, this makes him or her want to lash out.
You might find yourself being overly concerned about things that aren’t important. For example, you might spend hours worrying about whether your partner still loves you. Or you might be preoccupied with whether your partner will cheat on you.
This type of thinking isn’t healthy. It can lead to anxiety attacks and depression. So try to calm down and relax. Try to focus on things that really matter to you. And remember that your partner wants to be loved just as much as you do.
14. Lack of self-care
A toxic relationship is one where there is no mutual respect, trust, or love. There is no give and take. You don’t feel like you belong because you aren’t being accepted. You feel like you are constantly putting out fires and trying to fix things that aren’t broken. This type of situation is draining and leaves us feeling empty inside. We start to lose ourselves and our sense of identity.
We begin to withdraw from people we once enjoyed spending time with. We stop doing activities we used to enjoy. We stop taking care of ourselves. We become less interested in what we do and how we look. Our body starts to show signs of neglect. We put on weight, develop health problems, and experience mood swings.
If you’re headed in that direction, it’s time to reconsider your relationship or try to work on it.
15. Verbal Abuse
Verbal abuse is an under reported crime. It impacts victims’ self-esteem, relationships and mental health.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, one out of every three women are abused physically and/or sexually by their partners. One in four men experience domestic violence.
Verbal abuse is a sure sign of a highly toxic relationship.
Conclusion
If you’re in a toxic relationship, you might be suffering from one or more of the above? So what should you do?
First, get help! Ask for support from friends, family members, and professionals. They can provide you with information and resources to help you move forward. A good therapist can help you understand why you stay in such a toxic relationship. She or he can also help you figure out ways to improve your life.
Second, if you have children, talk to them about what is happening. Let them know that they deserve to be safe and protected. Tell them that you love them and that you want to keep them safe.
If the relationship is worth saving, both parties must be on board. Just ensure that you get some help if you are unable to do this alone.
