In a relationship, it is quite common that your partner and you may have some differences. There is nothing to be surprised about arguments, differences and disagreements in a relationship. Even in the most perfect relationship, people won’t always agree with each other and that’s fine. It is somewhat critical for the longevity of your relationship to have an open discussion about different issues or disagreements instead of arguments.
Here is how you can have a healthy argument that can ultimately save your relationship:
Don’t Avoid Conflict
Conflicts are naturally going to arise in any relationship. This is a part of a relationship because no two people are perfectly going to agree on everything. In fact, this can be healthy when approached as an opportunity for growth. It all depends on whether you are able to receive differences well or raise a difficult issue sensitively.
Stick To The Issue
Don’t say something you might regret later. Despite having a disagreement, always remember you are always a team with your partner. Never bring up irrelevant details just to prove your point. This is the quickest way to send an argument off track. You want to reach a resolution and not end up forgetting what you were fighting for in the first place.
Share Your Feelings
Instead of pointing fingers, start your side of the argument with what a situation made you feel. While the facts must be kept as objective as possible, you must also add how a problem made you feel. Give your partner the space to process it. You should also follow up with what you need or how you would like the other person to resolve the problem.
Engage In Active Listening
When communicating, make sure you are fully present in the conversation. Try to look for non-verbal cues to understand what the other person is feeling. You should always ask open-ended questions to encourage further responses and paraphrase and reflect back on what has been said. The idea of active listening is to listen to understand not listen to respond. While you’re at it, keep the judgment to the minimum and avoid giving advice.
Pause And Resolve
Always remember to hit the pause button if things get too heated. You can take a break and resume the conversation when both parties are in a much better mood. Your partner and you are more likely to reach a resolution that way instead of when you keep having a go at each other. Just don’t abandon the issue entirely.
